The beginning of new year always feels like a time for dreaming — what do I want, what will the new year bring? Some dreams are big, others quite small, some are more like wishes that would be nice to see come true someday. I have been dreaming about one thing. And now, years later, I am holding it (him) in my hands. Along the way, I repeatedly had to answer the question: why do I need this (him)? And that was good! Even though at times it felt annoying. But it made me stalk myself in order...

I can see doubts attacking me. Looking back in time, I cannot point to any major or extraordinary change in myself. Not that there has not been any. Losing faith in yourself is unbelievably easy and fast — you don’t even need any earth-shaking life events. Sometimes a seemingly small thing is enough.

A little over a month ago, I moved into a new home. This new place is the childhood dream coming true, and yet I found myself struggling to adjust. The city is now a 20-minute drive away — meaning even the grocery store is no longer just around the corner. When I step outside, there’s no need to grab my keys or lock the door; stepping outside itself is just a single step. And although the house is familiar to me, being here full-time is still different from just spending weekends — where and...